First of the firsts

After losing anyone, everyone always says it is the big events where you notice the missing presence of a loved one the most. Everyone also says that the first year is the hardest, as this is when you have to experience these big events for the first time. We recently had our first New Year…

Giving birth

Part 2 – The birth Leaving the hospital and going home to wait for 48 hours was torture. Knowing that my baby had died and was still inside me, not knowing why it had all happened and the prospect of having to tell everyone made me feel scared, guilty and lonely. It was the longest…

Finding out

How does stillbirth happen? There are lots of stories that you read in magazines and online of women who have lost their unborn child after noticing that they had some spotting or bleeding, or after their babies movements had reduced or stopped, or after they had agonizing pains in their stomachs. With Beatrice though I…